Looking for Someone Who Thinks a Sticker Is a Legitimate Currency | Behavior Tech, Middletown Township, NJ 🌱

🎪💜 MIDDLETOWN TOWNSHIP, NJ: THE CIRCUS IS UNSUPERVISED AND WE NEED AN ADULT. 💜🎪

🚨 THE CLOWNS HAVE STAGED A WALKOUT.
🐘 THE ELEPHANT HAS ENTERED HIS QUIET ERA.
🐠 AND KEVIN THE GOLDFISH HAS BEEN PROMOTED TO HEAD OF OPERATIONS.

Kevin has no experience, no references, and one brain cell currently doing laps around his fishbowl.

WE CANNOT KEEP RUNNING THIS OPERATION ON VIBES ALONE. 😭💀

So naturally… WE’RE HIRING YOU. 👀👇

🚨 NOW HIRING: Behavior Technician / ABA Para 🚨
📍 Middletown Township, NJ 07748
💸 $22–$30/hour (depending on experience 💰)
🎯 1-on-1 with an awesome kiddo
⏰ After-school & weekend sessions

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

🎠 WHAT DOES A TYPICAL DAY LOOK LIKE?

HAHAHAHA. TYPICAL. THAT’S CUTE. 🤡

Here’s what you might be doing:

🎲 Playing games that secretly teach important life skills. You’re basically a ninja. 🥷

🎨 Turning a simple activity into a full-blown cinematic universe. There will be plot twists. There may be glitter. Nobody knows what happens next.

🌟 Celebrating a new skill like your team just won the Super Bowl, the World Cup, AND custody of the aux cord. 🏆

🧩 Helping autistic children build skills, confidence, independence, and their own little superpowers. 💜

😂 Making silly noises, embracing the chaos, and discovering that your most marketable skill is apparently being VERY excited about bubbles.

You’ll leave each session with a full heart, a tired face, and at least one story that makes absolutely no sense to anyone who wasn’t there. ✨

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

🤩 WHY THIS JOB IS GIVING ✨ MAIN CHARACTER ENERGY ✨

💸 $22–$30/hour: Your bank account just sat up a little straighter.

🗓️ Flexible scheduling: Classes? Another job? Life being life? We get it. We offer after-school and weekend sessions.

🏃 NO CUBICLE PRISON. No fluorescent lights judging your existence. No sad desk salad. Just meaningful work, movement, play, and the occasional existential question from a seven-year-old.

🌱 Training and ongoing support: We will not throw you into the ABA wilderness with a clipboard and say, “May the odds be ever in your favor.” You’ll have support.

⭐ REAL, MEANINGFUL PROGRESS: Watching a child learn something new and knowing you helped make it happen? THAT’S THE GOOD STUFF. 🥹💜

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

🦄 WHO ARE WE LOOKING FOR?

✅ Someone patient, dependable, and upbeat. (Showing up on time already puts you ahead of Kevin.)

✅ Someone who enjoys working with children and understands that PLAY IS SERIOUS BUSINESS. 🎲

✅ Someone passionate about supporting autistic children with patience, respect, and encouragement. 💜

✅ Someone willing to make a ridiculous sound with their entire chest because it is apparently the funniest thing that has ever happened. 🤪

✅ Someone who can roll with the unexpected, celebrate the little wins, and bring positive energy to the room.

❌ Must be able to swim in a fishbowl. JUST KIDDING. Kevin has been removed from the hiring committee.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

🚨 WE’RE HIRING, AND THE PLOT IS MOVING QUICKLY. 🚨

Kevin has already printed 47 copies of his résumé, eaten two of them, and scheduled a performance review with the elephant.

PLEASE. WE NEED A QUALIFIED HUMAN. 😭🐠

📩 INTERESTED? MESSAGE US TODAY!

Come join a team where your work matters, your personality is welcome, and making a difference is the whole point. 💜

🎪 MIDDLETOWN TOWNSHIP, NJ — COME BE PART OF THE SHOW!

Apply today. Your future favorite tiny human is waiting to learn and grow with you. 🥹💜

P.S. Kevin says “blub blub.”

Our best guess? “Please stop letting me make hiring decisions and SEND IN YOUR APPLICATIONS.” 🐠📄💀